


Destination Cardiff

by MiladyDragon



Series: Dragon-Verse: Series Two [3]
Category: Destination Truth RPF, Torchwood
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Dragons, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Dragon-Verse, F/F, F/M, Humor, M/M, Magic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-23
Updated: 2012-08-23
Packaged: 2017-11-12 18:09:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/494177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiladyDragon/pseuds/MiladyDragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The "Destination Truth" team are in Cardiff investigating rumours of a dragon that likes to hang around the Millennium Centre.  Ianto isn't too happy about that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a short two-parter that I came up with for my Long Live Ianto Bingo Card, Prompt: Fairy Tales and Folklore. It's also as close to writing RPF as I'll ever get, since Josh Gates and Erin Ryder are real people, albeit television celebrities in a reality show. Personally I consider anyone in a reality show to be an actor, even if they're going by their real names.

 

**_24 June 2008_ **

 

 

Ianto Jones stood at the coffee machine in the Hub, humming a courting song while his hands moved smoothly over the controls, a small smile on his lips.

It had been a good night, but an early morning Weevil alert had sent Jack out into the wilds of Splott, leaving Ianto in an empty house.  He’d changed back into human form – since it was uncomfortable for him to sleep that way, and Jack seemed to enjoy resting beside his dragon body – showered, changed, and arrived at the Hub, with plenty of time to have coffee ready by the time his mate returned.

He was just pulling mugs down from the shelf when his mobile rang, with the ringtone that announced the call coming through the Tourist Office line. 

Frowning, Ianto pulled the phone from his pocket, recognizing the number as being from the Welsh Tourism Board.  He didn’t get many calls from them; they considered the Mermaid Quay office to be too small to bother with.

He flipped the phone open.  “Tourist Information Centre, Mermaid Quay, Ianto Jones speaking.”

_“Good morning, Mr. Jones.  This is Celia Allen, Director of Public Relations for the Tourism Board.  How are you?”_

Ianto recognized her name, although he had never spoken to her personally.  “Good morning, Ms Allen,” he answered politely.  “I’m doing very well, thank you.  What can I do for you?”

This was a bit of a surprise.  They usually left the Tourist Office alone, and would as long as Ianto was very careful to keep the tiny office’s accreditation up-to-date.  He could avoid any awkward questions that way.

_“I wanted to make you aware that an American production crew was going to be filming on the Plass starting on Wednesday evening.”_

Ianto’s frown turned into a grimace.  That wasn’t good.  Sometimes it was bad enough that the Hub was built under such a major tourist attraction…but this, there was no telling what might happen if some sort of camera crew were in the wrong place, at the wrong time.  “Really?” he answered, feigning being pleased at the news. 

 _“Oh yes,”_ Ms Allen went on enthusiastically.  _“It’s for a reality show called “Destination Truth”.  Have you heard of it?”_

“Vaguely.”  Actually, Ianto was fairly familiar with it; it was a show that purported to investigate such phenomena such as Yeti, skunk apes, and other mysterious creatures.  In fact, they’d managed to get on Archie’s nerves during their investigation of Loch Ness; the director of Torchwood Two had had to convince the Skarasen living in the Loch to leave long enough for the film crew to get their footage and to go back empty-handed.  Retconning the odd tourist was fine; but an American film crew?  That would have caused more problems than it was worth.

_“Well, they’re coming to look into rumours of a dragon hanging around the Millennium Centre.  It’s all a bit of nonsense, but anything that brings attention to Cardiff can’t be a bad thing, can it?”_

 

“Absolutely not.”Inwardly, Ianto cursed himself.How had that particular rumour gotten back to a production company in the US?It must have been through some tourist, because the local business people knew about Torchwood, if not exactly where they were based, and anything odd that seemed to happen around the bay was always chalked up to them and their ‘spooky-do’s’…which apparently included a mythical, winged creature who had the tendency to use the Millennium Centre roof as a launching pad.

 _“Their advance people will be in the area today,”_ she said.  _“They’ll be getting background on the supposed sightings, and will do preliminary interviews with local business owners and employees.  You should be expecting them pretty soon, I believe.  I do hope you’ll give our guests a good first impression!”_

Lovely.  Just what Ianto wanted to do today: show around a group of people determined to find a dragon.  Little would they know the person playing tour guide was the very dragon they sought, which was an irony Ianto didn’t want to look too closely at. 

Then he almost groaned aloud when he realized just how Jack was going to react, let alone the others.

“Certainly, Ms Allen,” he said smoothly.  “I’ll do my utmost.”

 _“That’s all I can ask,”_ she enthused.  _“Good luck, and if you need anything please don’t hesitate to call.”_

She rang off, leaving Ianto to wonder at just how quickly his day had gone from really good…to really, really bad.

 

**********

 

As he’d predicted, Jack was less than enthusiastic about the whole thing. 

In fact, he was downright pissed off.

“I thought you were careful about letting people get pictures of you,” he said sharply, after Ianto had explained.

Jack had come back in with the Weevil in tow, and smelling like the very sewer the creature had crawled out of.  So, he’d already been in a bad mood when Ianto had met him down at the cells.

“I thought I was,” Ianto admitted.  He thought he’d been cautious; he’d kept his eye out for anything that would show up on the internet, erasing or crashing or even discrediting it.  It was part of his job to do just that, as long as with any and all true alien sightings that were posted online.  “The only thing I can think of is that it was some sort of tourist who didn’t get so excited that they’d posted their picture of Facebook or somewhere else.”

“Instead they’d sent it in to some sort of reality show, and we’re going to have them filming on our very doorstep.”

“Yes, I’m afraid so.”

Together they got the Weevil into the cell, and then Ianto followed Jack up to his quarters so his mate could shower and change.  “Have you warned the others about coming in through the tourist entrance?”  Jack stormed into his office, shucking clothing as he went and not caring where they were flung.

Ianto flinched at the mess.“I have.Everyone will be coming in through the garage entrance for the time being.”He gingerly picked up the discarded shirt, pulling away from the smell.The cloth was also damp, which intimated that Jack had fallen into sewage at some point.No wonder his mate was being such a bear.   


Ianto didn’t want to see the inside of the SUV.  He shuddered at the mess that had to be waiting on him to clean up.

“Good.  Then, why don’t you go and meet this television crew, and see what they’ve actually got on our dragon.”

Ianto hastened to obey.  It wasn’t something he wanted to do, but at the same time he really didn’t want to hang around Jack’s anger, either.  He knew his temper, and Ianto was well aware that it would take Jack time to work through it.

Not that he blamed the immortal for being pissed off.  Ianto wasn’t happy about it, either.

 

**********

 

“So,” Owen drawled, “Dragon Boy is a celebrity.”

Ianto rolled his eyes.  He’d just spent the morning with the pre-production crew from “Destination Truth” and it had been an interesting experience.  “Not by choice,” he snarked back, setting the tray of coffees down on the boardroom table.

Jack had obviously shared Ianto’s new-found fame with the rest of the team by the time he’d finished showing the visitors around.Owen had wanted to know if Ianto could introduce him to Keira Knightly, his actress _du_ _jour_ ; Toshiko had pretended to be so awestruck that she would swoon every time she saw him; and Gwen had simply glared at him, disapproving of the whole thing.Ianto had taken it all in stride, until Jack had walked in with a “Destination Truth” t-shirt on and had asked Ianto to sign his penis.

Apparently his lover had gotten over being mad about the whole ‘his mate was seen in his natural form by a tourist’ thing.

“How did they find out?”  Toshiko asked, taking her coffee.  “You’re usually so careful…”

“Apparently,” Ianto answered, “someone got a very blurry picture of something large and green perched on the roof of the Millennium Centre.”  He pulled the copy he’d been given out of his jacket pocket, passing it around.

“How the bloody hell did they get a dragon out of that?”  Owen scoffed as he took a good look at the photo.

Gwen didn’t really look at it, but passed it on to Toshiko, who laughed.  “I’m guessing they’re taking the photographer’s word that this is really a dragon.”  She gave it to Jack, who barked out a laugh.

“All we need is a young Steve McQueen and we have enough to make _The Blob,”_ he chortled.  Ianto raised an eyebrow in surprise at Jack’s movie reference.   “What?” he demanded. 

“You know _The Blob_ ,” Ianto said, “but you didn’t know _Lord of the Rings_?”

Jack shrugged.  “I would have watched it a lot sooner, if I’d known Viggo Mortensen was so hot.  Besides, I had a lot more time in the 50’s to go out and enjoy myself than I do now.”

Ianto had to concede the point.  “But the pre-production team got ahold of it through a personal friend of someone on another show, and decided to investigate.  The reason I didn’t know about it was that it was never published anywhere.  It was sent straight on to the person responsible for getting them their cases.”

“We’re going to need to be more careful from now on,” Jack warned.  “We’ve been able to head off any witnesses to Ianto’s transformations until now, and honestly…this was bound to happen eventually.  I just never even considered that it would show up on an American television programme.”

“Can’t we just Retcon the film crew?”  Gwen asked.

Ianto shook his head.  “Too many people outside Cardiff would know the reason for them being here.  We’d have to Retcon at least half a hundred individuals in order to completely hide anything.”

“Archie had this same crew out on Loch Ness,” Jack added.  “Luckily Nessie was cooperative, and kept hidden while they were there.”

“There’s really a Loch Ness Monster?”  Gwen asked, surprised.

“Remnant of an attempted alien takeover in the 1970’s,” Jack answered.“A particularly nasty race of shape-changers who’d been stranded on Earth for centuries were using her as a food source.They lived on her milk, apparently.When the Doctor defeated the takeover, Nessie went back to live in the loch.Everyone thought it was the best solution, and Archie adores her even though she can be a real terror.”

Ianto wondered when Gwen would stop being surprised at whatever she heard regarding aliens. 

“Back on topic,” Jack said.  “We’re going to do the same thing here.  Let the film crew come, and then keep the dragon under wraps until they’re gone.  The businessmen around here pretty much know about it anyway, and will keep the secret.”

“Hell,” Owen said, “they know about Torchwood and keep that secret too.”

“They’re actually proud of it,” Toshiko added.  “It’s almost become a status symbol: the closer to the bay, the bigger the bragging rights."                                                                                                           

“You can ask anyone in Cardiff about Torchwood, and they’ll be pointed toward the bay,” Ianto replied.

“I still say I didn’t know a thing about Torchwood until that night, at that crime scene,” Gwen groused.

“That’s because you just didn’t talk to the right people,” Jack answered.  “Okay, let’s get back to work.  Ianto, when is the actual film crew going to show up?”

“Wednesday.”

“And I’m guessing the Tourism Board wants you to spend time with them?”

Ianto grimaced.  “Unfortunately.”

“Then it’ll be up to you to keep them busy.  Afterward, you’ll need to stay under cover until they’re gone.”

He gave Jack a heated look.  “I’m certain I can find things to do until after they’re gone.”

Jack leered back.  “I can always assign you…extra duties.”

“Jesus Fucking Christ,” Owen exclaimed, “just stop already!”


	2. Chapter 2

 

**_26 June 2008_ **

****

 

Ianto glanced at his watch.  It was almost noon, and that was when the crew from “Destination Truth” was due to show up.  He’d have been a bit nervous, if he wasn’t so irritated at himself for getting into this situation in the first place.  Well, he’d just have to get through this, and then the Americans would be gone without their proof that there was, indeed, a dragon in Cardiff.

He’d wondered vaguely if he should have called Her Majesty…and then realized that she would have gotten too much enjoyment out of it to help extricate him from this mess.Besides, the producers of the show might have taken it as confirmation if the Queen had called up and told them to cease and desist.

At noon precisely, the door to the Tourist Office opened, and two people stepped through.  Ianto gave them his best professional smile.  “Welcome to Cardiff,” he greeted them cordially.

The woman he’d met before; she was Erin Ryder, a producer on the show; she’d been with the group who’d come a couple of days ago in order to scout the area.  She was an attractive woman, with dirty blonde hair and a ready smile.  That smile was turned on him as she reached across the counter to offer her hand.  “It’s good to see you again, Mr. Jones,” she replied.  “Let me introduce you to Josh Gates.”

Ianto gave the man a good once over.  Josh Gates was a tall, bulky man who looked every inch the adventurous television presenter that he was.  His smile was, if possible, almost as bright as one of Jack’s finest, and he wore his brown hair short, accompanied by artistically scruffy stubble.  His grip was firm but he didn’t try to outdo Ianto in strength.  “Nice to finally meet you.”  His voice was just as friendly as it was on the telly.  “It’s nice to know that Ryder hasn’t started exaggerating things.  I was beginning to wonder when she’d described you.”

Ryder rolled her eyes and jabbed Gates in the ribs.  “Stop it, you.  I have to apologize for him; he’s been out in the jungle too long and has apparently forgotten his manners.”

Ianto shook his head.  “No apology needed.  In fact, it’s good to know there are more people like my boss out there in the world.”

That earned him a laugh from the producer.  “Oh lord, you work with one too?”

“Hey!” Gates exclaimed.  “No mocking the talent, here.”

That was when Ianto knew he was going to like Josh Gates.  It was too bad he was there to hunt him down, though, for the purpose of good television.

Ianto came out from behind the counter.  “I was told that you wanted to film something called ‘establishing shots’ today, before you do your actual investigation tonight?”

“Close enough,” Ryder answered, as she and Gates stepped aside to let him open the door. 

He ushered them outside.  It was a beautiful day, and Ianto smiled up into the sun.  Then he locked the Tourist Office door behind them and led them toward the Plass.  “I’m certain the logistics of filming in a city is quite different than filming out in the middle of nowhere.”

Ryder began explaining things to him as they walked, and Ianto found himself enjoying learning more about filming a television series.  “And we’ve gotten permission from the Mayor to have the power to the entire area cut for the night –“

Ianto raised his eyebrows at that.  He was glad that the Hub had its own generators, if they’d managed to get the Mayor onside.   “I certainly hope the local constabulary has been warned.”

“Oh yes,” she answered.  “They’re going to be doing crowd control as well, to make sure our investigation isn’t interrupted.”

They continued chatting as they made their way into the Plass, Ianto explaining a bit of history about the Millennium Centre and the Roald Dahl Plass.  “Have you ever seen this so-called dragon?”  Gates asked curiously as the conversation seemed to lag a little. 

Now, _that_ was a trick question!

“I’ve heard rumours, certainly,” Ianto admitted.  He couldn’t very well pretend ignorance, when he worked in the area.  “Apparently it only began appearing about seven to eight years ago.”

“There are legends in every country in the world about dragons,” Gates enthused.  “I do hope we find some sign, although I have to admit looking for a dragon in a city has to be one of the strangest hunts we’ve gone on.  Cryptids aren’t usually found perched on top of buildings in busy metropolitan areas.”

“I’ve seen the photograph,” Ianto said, “and I have to admit I didn’t get a dragon out of it.  My boss commented that all we’d need is Steve McQueen and we could reshoot _The Blob_.”

Gates laughed.  “True, but we’ve worked with less.  That’s half the fun!”

 

**********

 

A several hours later, Ianto was finally locking up the Tourist Office for the night.  He didn’t want to just go down to the Hub and run the risk of someone on the filming crew up on the Plass noticing him not walking by; besides, he’d done the polite thing and had made coffee for the entire crew, filling four thermoses of his best, and he wanted to deliver it.

He’d found himself enjoying his time with Ryder and Gates, more than he’d thought he would.  Gates actually seemed genuinely interested in finding lost species, and not for exploitation, which was a surprise considering he made his living on television searching for what he’d called ‘cryptids’. 

The film crew had set up smack dab in the middle of the Plass.  There were a little over half a dozen people settled around various pieces of equipment, and they all looked up as he approached. 

Ianto smiled, reaching into his satchel and pulling out the thermos flasks.  “I thought you might all like some coffee,” he offered, handing each over.

“You are amazing,” Ryder answered, standing and accepting one of the thermoses. 

“It’s the least I could do.”  After all, they wouldn’t be seeing a dragon tonight, so he could make their stay a bit comfortable.  “I’m heading home, so good night.”

Several voices wished him one as well, and then as he was walking toward the car park a loud moan echoed across the Plass, and he couldn’t help the smirk.  It was good to know he could get that response from strangers, but Jack still did the pornographic coffee moan better.

 

**********

 

Ianto had decided to go to the car park as if he was getting his car, and then sneak back into the Hub through the garage entrance.  No one would be able to see him pull out from the Millennium Centre, so it was safe for him to double back. 

The rest of the team was waiting when he arrived.  Toshiko was at her station, a camera view of the Plass up on one of her screens; since the power would be cut to the area at dusk, and they would lose their views from the CCTV, she’d set up her own on the roof of the Millennium Centre, aimed at the Plass and the American film crew camped out on it. 

“Looks like a boring night,” she commented as Ianto approached.

“I hope so,” the dragon answered. 

“There aren’t any Rift alerts predicted for tonight,” she assured him.

“That doesn’t necessarily mean anything,” Jack replied, joining them.

“Which is why I’m here,” the technician said, “instead of at home.  Besides, Kathy is working tonight.”

“She doing security for the Plass?” Ianto asked.

“It was all hands on deck,” Toshiko confirmed.  “Apparently dragon-hunting is a big enough deal that the Mayor didn’t want anything messing it up, including any drunken yobbos who might try to crash the party.”  She grinned up at him.  “Kathy asked me for your autograph, by the way.  She said she’s never met anyone famous before.”

Ianto rolled his eyes good-naturedly.  “I’m certain she has my signature on records at the police department.  After all, someone has to sign for all the tickets Jack gets.”

“Hey!” Jack protested.  “I don’t get that many tickets!”

“Keep telling yourself that, Harkness,” Owen butted in, coming up into the main Hub area from the autopsy bay. 

“Don’t get me started on your citations, Owen,” Ianto added.  “The only two people here without the constant threat of having their licenses pulled are me and Tosh.  Oh, and Gwen, but that’s only because she hasn’t been here quite long enough to get that bad yet.”

Gwen wasn’t there to defend herself; Jack had sent her home to be with Rhys, which in Ianto’s opinion was a good thing.  Jack had also said that, if the night was too quiet, that he would consider doing the same with everyone else, but Ianto knew that his mate felt uncomfortable leaving the American film crew alone up on the Plass.  He certainly didn’t blame Jack for it, since enough weird stuff happened in Cardiff to warrant the caution. 

At about one in the morning, that decision proved to be a very good one.

 

**********  

 

Ianto watched as Jack spoke to the Sylians, who were currently carrying more recording equipment than the most radical Japanese tourists.

“Aliens?”  Gates was practically jumping up and down in delight.  “Honest-to-God aliens?”

The dragon had to admit, yes, they were aliens.

“You seem awfully blasé about it,” the presenter went on.  “Does this happen frequently?”

“Cardiff is…”  Ianto sighed.  “Cardiff was built on a Rift in time and space.  A lot of weird things happen around here.  People just…have grown up around it.  We’re used to it.”

Gates was looking at him shrewdly.  “I’m thinking you know more than you’re telling, Mr. Jones.”

Ianto smirked.  “You could be right.”

He could hear Jack jabbering at the Sylians, and they were nodding and making happy squeaky noises.  Ianto knew they were speaking Galactic Standard, a language that Jack had yet to teach him, but had promised that he would. 

“I can’t believe we came here looking for a dragon,” Ryder gasped, “and found aliens instead.  Our ratings will go through the roof!”

Which was exactly what Ianto knew they’d need to avoid.

“You do realize that you can’t show any of the footage you’re currently filming,” the dragon said, turning to look at her.

Ryder looked gobsmacked.  “This is what humanity has been looking for for decades!”

 “But they’re not ready,” Ianto answered.  “Humanity isn’t ready for the knowledge that we’re not alone in the universe.  What I and my team have seen…it would drive the average person insane on the best of days.   It’s not that we really want to hide this…it’s that we _have_ to.  There’s no choice.”  He thought back about the Year, and what he’d seen on his travels around the Earth; of humans who’d worked together to defeat the Master. 

But there had been far too many more that had been unable to deal with the knowledge that there was danger out there, that there were aliens so much more powerful than them, and it had destroyed them.

No, humanity wasn’t ready.  Some of them may never be.

He turned to regard Josh Gates, knowing that he had to appeal to the man’s nature, to his need to find and protect creatures different from themselves.  “You know the legends of the dragons.”

Gates nodded.  “I know that every country has stories of them.”

“Then you also know that humanity was responsible for their extinction.”

The adventurer’s eyes narrowed.  “Those are some of the stories, yes.”

“If humans reacted that way to a creature that had evolved upon this planet for millions of years, how would they react to an alien who doesn’t have such ties to this world, even if they were harmless?”

Gates didn’t have a chance to answer, because Jack was approaching with the Sylians in tow.  There were five of them, their yellow skin and wide, pale eyes marking them as different from the humans on the Plass.  “Pardon us for butting in,” Jack said, “but the Sylians wanted to meet the great Joshua Gates and maybe get an autograph.”

This was perhaps the first time in his admittedly short acquaintance with the presenter that Ianto had seen Gates speechless.  “The Sylians are the ultimate tourist race,” he explained to the “Destination Truth” team.  “They have very limited time travel capabilities and they often tour places of historical importance.”

“The Plass gets more than its fair share of tourists because apparently we’re famous in the future,” Jack added.  “But these came all the way to see you.  They’re great fans of your show, and they knew from transmissions that you’d be here tonight.  Since they aren’t really made for wilderness settings, they thought that coming here would be the best.  Plus, it gave them a chance to see the Plass in all its glory.  It was a win-win for them.” 

The taller of the Sylians – obviously the elder of the group – chattered happily at Jack, who was grinning very nearly like a loon.  “Oh, and they also ask if they can get a photo op, too.”  He winked.  “They really are the greatest tourists in the galaxy.”

“You can understand them?”  Ryder asked.

Jack shrugged.  “It’s Galactic Standard, the common language of several galaxies.  I learned it in school.”

“What school teaches outer space languages?”

Jack simply winked at her.

The Sylian elder was glancing between Jack and Gates, who was still looking a bit shocked by it all.   “Um…” Gates had to clear his throat twice before he could speak, “sure, I’d be glad to give them an autograph and have some pictures taken.”

Jack translated, and the Sylians practically vibrated in sheer fannishness. 

 

**********

 

“You know,” Gates said, after the Sylians had had what passed for a squeefest in their species and had gone home – with a stern warning to let Torchwood know the next time they planned on visiting, “I suspect that you know more about this dragon we were supposed to find than you’re telling.”

Ianto quirked an eyebrow at him.  “I don’t know what you mean.”

Gates smirked.  “Yeah, I’m sure.” 

“Here, I’ve made some more coffee….”

 

**********

 

Toshiko had no problem erasing the footage the film crew had taken of the Sylians, and replacing it with not much of anything.  A judicious use of the lowest dosage of Retcon available meant that the time that the aliens had been present on the Plass was overwritten, replaced with boredom and lack of any findings whatsoever.  It wasn’t what they’d wanted to do, using Retcon could open up too many doors they might not be able to close, but there had been no way they could let that group out of Cardiff knowing what they did.

The glitches in the camera and scientific data were blamed on faulty equipment.  It would most likely get the various techs in trouble for not maintaining things properly, but Toshiko was an expert in making such things look natural.

In the end, the “Destination Truth” crew went home with nothing.

Ianto found himself not at all being bothered by that.

Although, there was a part of him who wished he could have had one more conversation with Josh Gates.  The man had seemed open-minded and knowledgeable, and the dragon felt that he could have been one of those few humans who could know his secret and be fine with it.  However, that was not meant to be.

Ianto did see the film crew off with commiserations on not finding what they were looking for…and to make certain the Retcon would hold.  Everything looked fine, and they were all gone by noon.

“So,” Jack drawled, as he and his mate shut down the Hub for the rest of the day, Jack having given the rest of the team the day off in order to get some rest after being up all night.  He’d almost called Gwen in to watch the Hub by herself, but Ianto had talked him out of it.  “How does it feel to be a mystery all over again?”

Ianto snorted.  “I can certainly live with it.  I never asked to be a celebrity, after all.”

“Owen’s a bit irritated that he’s not going to be meeting Keira Knightly.”

“He’d probably scar the poor woman for life.”

Jack laughed.  “You’re probably right.  Setting Owen loose would do more harm than good.”

Together, they made their way toward the car park, their shoulders brushing as they walked.  “You know, if they do ever become suspicious of their equipment failures and weird memories…”

“Then we’ll deal with that when it happens,” Jack answered.  “For now, we’re going home and you’re going to let me ravish you.”

The dragon grinned.  “I am, am I?”

“Yes, you are.”

“You sound very confident of that.”

“That’s because you have me right where I want you.”

Ianto laughed as they got into his car.  “That doesn’t make a lot of sense, Jack.”

“Sure it does.  Now, take me home and let’s forget about television crews and anything else for the time being –“

And that was when Ianto’s mobile rang, using the ring tone of the Tourist Office.

The dragon sighed, answering it.  “Tourist Information Centre, Mermaid Quay.  Ianto Jones speaking.”

There was a chuckle over the line.  “ _You_ _know_ ,” the unmistakable voice of Joshua Gates said, “ _that stuff you put in our coffee worked really well with the rest of my crew.”_

“But not with you, obviously.”

_“Afraid not.  But don’t worry…as much as I’d love to be the one to break the news to the world that aliens really exist and visit our planet regularly, you did a really good job of destroying any evidence that we’d had.  Besides, I understood what you said, about Earth being ready, and you’re right.  Although I think you were speaking from experience…weren’t you?”_

Ianto glanced at Jack, who looked confused.  “I might have been,” he hedged.

_“Yeah, thought so.  Well, our flight is gonna be leaving soon.  I just wanted to let you know you didn’t have anything to worry about.  It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Jones.”_

“And you as well, Mr. Gates.  Have a nice flight back to the States.”  He flipped his phone closed, shaking his head in wonder.  “It appears that our Mr. Gates is immune to Retcon.”

Jack sighed.  “Are we going to have to do something more drastic?”

“No.  He understands why we’re keeping it a secret.”

“That’s good to know.  Now, how about we go home now?  I have some ravishing to do.”

The dragon laughed.  “I should hope so.”

He put the car into gear, and headed toward home.

 

 

 


End file.
